Worthless Fortune Cookies

What ever happened to fortune cookies that actually have a fortune in them? I'm tired of eating at lackluster Chinese joints, having them push Costco fortune cookies as their own, only to excitedly break open my fortune cookie to reveal that, "You have a love for arts and music."

What?

Give me a stinking break. A fortune cookie is not a palm reading. I don't need to know things about myself that aren't true. All the typist needed to do was add the word, "will" before "have." That way, it becomes a fortune. As it stands now, the cookies should be called "Psychotherapy in Cheap Cookie Cookies." One of my co-workers got one that said, "You are kind to animals."

Again, what?

If they can't be so kind as to lay out my personal future in cookie form, then why would I care about what lotto numbers they suggest on the back? They don't even say, "Here are your lotto numbers." They say, "Here are your suggested lotto numbers."

Worthless. Totally worthless.